le_centre | OOM: An Adventure in the Making

'Citizen, you wound me! To suggest that I, the most encompassing of souls, would shun your shrubbery - you are heartless, monsieur, heartless indeed.'

He springs to his feet (sways a little), and affects a deep bow in the direction of the proffered pot, culminating in a solemn shaking of its leaf.

'There! You will cast aspersions on my admiration of greenery no more. Monsieur le Mandrake, please, I beg you humbly, accept my apology in any perceived rudeness.'

So. What was he saying? Bossuet. What was he saying?

There is a lot of blue in this room.

'I propose a change of scenery. No, you do. Very well. If it will remove me from your angels, very well.'

The plant shows no signs of reacting to the introduction, but Lesgle beams and pats it fondly before putting it back into its birdcage. (Away from the kittens, you know. And it has its own sunlamp now for the winter.)

"I don't mind sharing the proposal. We both propose a change of scenery: you, to get away from my angels, and I, for the sake of finding out whatever will be Bahorel's fault and keeping it away from Joly's laboratory. Have you your hat, Courfeyrac? Yes? Excellent. I suggest a stroll in the gardens."

In the winter. The way you do.

'I must say, your green fellow there is not the most jovial company.'

He removes this thought by means of another swig of the mystery drink, and makes his way towards the door.

'I have a hat, though it is not yet a match to the one lost. No matter! It will serve for as long as it takes to find Bahorel's misdemeanour; they are usually close enough to hand.'

He wanders out into the hall before it occurs to him to check the level of the bottle; it would not do for it to start too low. But no, it is near the top still. It will suffice.

'A stroll in the gardens, then!' He flings an arm around Bossuet's neck. 'Indeed, that is a fine idea. You are turning into quite the country gentleman, citizen; you will find a gun in your hand and a brace of hare at your feet at any moment. Your mandrake is leading you astray.'

"I beg your pardon, that mandrake has won me at least two kisses. No, three. Four, in fact. You're just envious."

Lesgle is hardly the man to go out without checking his own supplies. Besides Courfeyrac's bottle, there's a flask in Lesgle's pocket, and he collects an extra bottle on his way out, just in case. It makes for a certain amount of clanking when Courfeyrac slings an arm around him. "Never hares; I feel a certain kinship for them; I may have no hare of my own to admire, but I feel sympathy for long-legged amorous creatures prone to finding themselves without a roof..."

A discourse on the habits of hares--mad in the spring, sagacious at other times, not to be confused with the shorter-eared warren-dwelling rabbit--takes them to a doorway, and soon they too are without a roof.

Edited 2015-01-20 11:43 (UTC)

Four kisses? He is certainly envious.

But he is diverted by this monologue on hares - even if the exact distinctions between they and rabbits might escape him on later reflection.

'Bossuet,' he says eventually, when there has been grass and then trees for what seems a long time, 'I have never been this far into the forest, and begin to suspect-' he takes a long swig from the bottle, 'that you are leading me astray. If I disappear for months as Enjolras and Grantaire did, I would like you to know that I will not hold you to blame; no, I accept responsibility as any honourable man would, and you should not feel badly for suggesting such a thing as a walk.'

He does not mind walking, but it is more like stumbling at this point; cold air on top of drunkenness only ever makes it worse.

And only one of the kisses was from Joly!

Lesgle is in the middle of explaining again that the rabbit lives in groups in a burrow underground, whereas the hare lives a largely solitary life above-ground, which may, along with its passionate disposition in the spring, account for its interludes of madness--when Courfeyrac interrupts him.

He stops and looks around. "Rather a cold night for leading someone astray outdoors, Courfeyrac. If I had any designs like that I would have stayed sensibly put. --No, but where--" Hmm.

Hmm.

Hmmmmmmm.

After turning himself around three or four times and consulting with his bottle, he says "Aha!" Then he says it again for good measure. "Do you see? This is the way we came, and that way is the Labyrinth. How clever ones feet are."

Edited 2015-01-20 22:36 (UTC)

Courfeyrac considers whether, with Bossuet's luck, he should set much store by the man's confidence - but not for very long because he is drunk, and besides, he hasn't been paying any sort of attention anyway.

'The Labyrinth!'

Also, he is diverted by this.

'The place where you found Paris?'

"The same!"

He peers around just to be sure, but Lesgle's sense of location is generally quite good when he's drunk. "Yes, I'm quite sure of it. We might as well have a look, don't you think? If we can find the Labyrinth while we're drunk, we may find Paris as well!"

With incisive logic like this, it's really a shame he never got that law degree.

It is logic that makes sense to Courfeyrac! He grins, and grips Bossuet's arm.

'Yes, we must! I should like to see Paris again, even if it is different. It would be-'

In his haze, he struggles to find the word.

'-exciting. Interesting. I should like to set foot in France as a Republic.'

Oh dear, he fears he is becoming maudlin. That will never do; he drinks again at once, and deeply, because Paris must be met with all good cheer!

"Yes. Yes, you young people who have never drawn breath in a republic deserve better." Why, he drew breath in a nominal republic for a full year and then some, as an infant, before the Empire was formalized!

Bossuet claps a hand on Courfeyrac's shoulder and sways affectionately at him. If Courfeyrac weren't also gripping his arm, there might be a question of losing verticality. "We shall find her. Our Patria. But let me make a call first and tell Joly not to wait up. You know, I regret not taking his walking-stick. If I had thought we would take a walk...sandwiches..."

Whatever he's saying about sandwiches is lost in the lapel of his coat as he searches his pockets for the magical-or-scientific communicative watch.

"Joly? Joly Joly Jolllllly-y-yyy--ah--that is, this is Bossuet, and not an opera-singer, telling you not to wait up for me. That is, if you want to you may, I would never discourage it, but you need not feel obliged. Courfeyrac and I are off to see Paris--poor lad, he's never set foot in the French Republic--come to think of it, neither have you--you will have to come along--no, but wait, I was telling you not to stay up, as you probably work tomorrow--I will let you sleep," he concludes magnanimously, and pockets the watch again.

He's still getting the hang of talking on the phone.

Joly is in fact wide awake, and in his lab, and happily covered in wires at the moment the open watch on his table starts talking. Which is why he can't get to it before Lesgle clicks silent.

Which doesn't stop Joly from immediately trying to contact him again. "Bossuet, wait- what do you mean, Paris? How are you going to Paris? When in Paris? Which Republic?? Who's taking you there?"

These are important questions! There are potentially very worrying answers.

He and Courfeyrac are underway again when his coat starts speaking to him. A certain amount of pocket-fumbling has to happen as well, and they're nearly at the Labyrinth entrance by the time he answers.

"Allô, Joly! I thought you'd be too tied up in science to answer. It's the Fifth, isn't it? The Fifth Republic? In 2013? I believe it's the Fifth. Our dear proud First Republic is dated until 1804, although I admit it wasn't much of one under the Directory or the Consulate, and then the second one will come along in 1848...there's another in 1870...Courfeyrac, do you remember, will the Fourth Republic be established in '45 or '46? Well, never mind that--we're at the Labyrinth, and you're very welcome to come join us if you like, but I know you've got something terribly involved happening with wires, I--ah--Joly? Joly?"

He taps his watch, tries again, and shrugs. "Not working. Ah, well! But here we are, Courfeyrac, in the Labyrinth itself!"

He is going to answer, 'I believe '46?' but by the time the thought has come, he has forgotten what the question was, and Bossuet has moved on in any case. So he gazes around and blinks at the darkness, and checks his hand to make sure the bottle is still there.

'This is not Paris.'

Most decidedly not.

"How observant you are! Enlightened and enlightening, round and radiant..." Wait, has Coufreyrac had That Book inflicted on him yet? Bossuet hurries on. "It is not Paris. It is a Labyrinth; naturally to reach one's treasure one must first find it. I am assured by the highly trustworthy Dr. Lecter that the only way out is to continue--no turning back--so I propose that we keep walking."

He links an arm through Courfeyrac's, once he can find it, and adds more prosaically, "It ought to get lighter soon."

'Good good. I am not stranger to finding the treasure before enjoying it.'

Linking arms is fine, and also sensible! It's dark, after all. Courfeyrac wanders along amiably enough, humming to himself and waiting for Paris to arrive. He does know what a Labyrinth is, of course, and has heard the thrilling tales of Dragons! from Bossuet...it's simply that all that it on the other side of alcohol, and currently not particularly real.

'Do you suppose,' he says, after a short while, 'that if we actually tried to go back, the entrance will literally not be there? Or simply that we will be prevented from reaching it in some way? If I were a scientist, I would say that would be a worthy experiment - not simply because it would also test Lecter's trustworthiness in some matters - but as I am not, I say onward!'

"Hrm." Laigle cranes his neck to look behind them--nearly turning them around in the process--but there's a certain forbidding darkness that makes Courfeyrac's suggestion of onward seem particularly appealing. Yes. Onward!

And indeed, it does get lighter soon; around a corner they come to a rack hung with very ordinary lanterns. Bossuet takes one. The wobbling, flickering light just makes the shadows more forbidding. "Do you know--Courfeyrac--if I'd been thinking--not that I wasn't thinking, I understand that one's brain is always engaged in thought even when nothing seems to come of it--but if I'd been thinking--"

He clears his throat. "Maybe it would have been wise to bring my lance. The one from the dragon's hoard. You know."

'Mmmm.'

He ponders this deeply, giving it all the consideration it deserves.

And drinks some more. This means he has to let go of Laigle's arm, because he decides it's probably sensible if he takes a lantern as well.

'Do you mean to return it? Or in case of danger?'

Two lanterns make the light-and-shadows business much less disconcerting. "In case of danger, of course. I have no intention of returning my dragon-treasure. Ah--unless the dragon comes to the bar looking for it, of course. No one wants to be the fool who got his whole village burned to the ground because of a misunderstanding about magical trinkets."

He's been venturing ahead while he speaks, and now turns to look at Courfeyrac again. "Behold! Our fate is in our hands; the passage divides; choose left, right, or center."

'Yes, but-' he points out, coming to a halt, '-if you give the lance back, there may be no danger to be had.'

He raises his voice a little because there is more light now, but the noise echoes unpleasantly, and he becomes aware that while their immediate area is better lit, it only makes the darkness outside that sphere even more impenetrable.

He lowers his voice again.

'I vote centre - ahead straight, my friend! - but of course this is an equal society, and each of us have a vote.'

"If we find the dragon," he answers, somewhat nettled, "I'll leave it an IOU and come back later, all right? I didn't notice you packing anything other than refreshments..."

That was a little unfair. He gives Courfeyrac an apologetic look, and nods to his choice at the fork in the tunnel. "I often incline to the left, but in this case your sounder judgment shall prevail. Center it is." The path of moderation!

And indeed, the center route does seem to have been a good choice. The walls get lighter regardless of their lanterns, and after a few minutes they seem to be walking down a comfortably-carpeted hallway rather than a stone tunnel.

His eyebrows rise a little at the jibe, but very well, perhaps this is a good time to become more serious.

...though there is still plenty of refreshment left, so perhaps later. He nudges Bossuet's arm with his own, grins and bites back a comment about inclining towards the left.

'I very much doubt we will find dragons in here. I defer to your greater knowledge, my friend - do we leave the lanterns and hope there will be more on the other side of this, or carry them with us?'

It is a very good, thick carpet. The wood panelling on the walls appears to be of fine quality too, and is shiny and deep brown. He can smell the faint whiff of polish.

"I prefer to keep my lantern, in case of...in case. Of situations." Yes. In case of situations.

Such as a door on their right. Laigle lifts his lantern to it, to check for a sign on the door, but it creaks open before he can even touch it. "Ah--Courfeyrac? It does at least look like it might be in Paris."

Coufeyrac is beginning to suspect that Bossuet suspects danger, which is extremely suspicious because confronting a dragon sounded more like fun than anything when the story was told. Or at least, that's how it worked out in Courfeyrac's head. Before he was drunk. Or maybe because.

All thoughts on this matter dissolve when the door creaks open. What sits before them is little short of a horror - a horror neither of them has ever been prepared to face.

Thick books on the shelves. A large, mahogany desk in view. Plush carpet and piles of paper, the sight of a fountain pen that would cost as much as two months food for a poor family...Courfeyrac grips Bossuet's arm in fear, his eyes wide.

'Laigle,' he whispers, in horror. 'Is this what I think-?'

Edited 2015-01-22 22:30 (UTC)

"--A law office."

The words can't be taken back, once they're spoken, though putting the horror into words only makes it all the more real.

They had barely stepped into the room--had they even stepped into it at all?--when the door slams shut behind them.

Bossuet pats Courfeyrac's hand where it clutches his arm, and walks slowly into the middle of the room. So much mahogany. So much plush. So much leather binding. And two desks. Two desks: that's what really makes his heart begin to tremble. One desk tidier than the other, but both quite respectable; the tidier desk ranged about with small portraits. Photographs, they must be.

Lesgle reaches for one, picks it up and studies it, and then passes it to Courfeyrac, pale-faced.

Curly dark hair around an advancing bald spot. A well-cut coat and waistcoat over a middle-aged paunch. A cheerful smile: a successful smile.

Courfeyrac's face goes from theatrical horror to actual horror in the space of a heartbeat. He puts his lantern down - not the bottle, though - and takes the photograph. For once, he does not think about how such things are made, but instead stares at his own fat face, on top of his own fat body, in clothes that are easily as expensive as his father's and probably more so, and...

'This is my...no. No, this is our office.'

He stares at Bossuet.

'...did we not die after all?'

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